ladyoflisquill (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ladyoflisquill) wrote2009-09-15 07:16 pm
ladyoflisquill) wrote2009-09-15 07:16 pm
Entry tags:
Patrick Swayze RIP
I debated with myself about writing this. There are so many people posting their own thoughts and feelings or simply adding in an RIP, I wondered what I had to add that was any different. What could this thirty year old Irish dyke actually add to the words and memories of millions of others? Patrick Swayze was an actor on the movie or TV screen, he was not a friend of mine, he was not my brother or my lover but still he had an impact on my life.
As a lesbian it's often expected by others that my life is relatively man free. It's not. In actual fact I would say I've easily had more male friends over the years. It's also expected that I am unable to find men attractive or appealing and while on the most part that is true, it's not a rule. My sexuality, my lesbianism, is something that I am very proud of but I have never been one to box myself in. And before I say anything else let me be clear that I am speaking only for my own sexuality. I am not and never would speak for all lesbians.
In all honesty Patrick Swayze was probably my first crush. I saw Dirty Dancing for the first time at about ten years old and I can still feel the rush I got when Johnny Castle walked onto the screen for the first time. Black leather jacket thrown over his shoulder and sunglasses covering his eyes. I, along with Jennifer Grey and half the female population, gasped in surprise. I watched the movie over and over again. I practiced the moves with one of my friends, the girl I would eventually have my first kiss with, and let me tell you those were some raunchy moves. Somehow in all of that Dirty Dancing became about more than just a good looking guy in a black tank top. It became about the fantasy of meeting the one person would would dance with you to the music and the moves you both loved. It became about listening to your heart instead of what people were telling you to do. It became about standing up not only for love but for what is right and just and about not being afraid to do that.
Growing up is never easy and I think growing up queer adds its own set of problems to wrestle with but Johnny Castle and Baby taught me a lot about how to live and love and most importantly how to dance like no one is watching.
P.S. I've had this icon for a long time and it feels really sad that this is the first time I'm using it.
As a lesbian it's often expected by others that my life is relatively man free. It's not. In actual fact I would say I've easily had more male friends over the years. It's also expected that I am unable to find men attractive or appealing and while on the most part that is true, it's not a rule. My sexuality, my lesbianism, is something that I am very proud of but I have never been one to box myself in. And before I say anything else let me be clear that I am speaking only for my own sexuality. I am not and never would speak for all lesbians.
In all honesty Patrick Swayze was probably my first crush. I saw Dirty Dancing for the first time at about ten years old and I can still feel the rush I got when Johnny Castle walked onto the screen for the first time. Black leather jacket thrown over his shoulder and sunglasses covering his eyes. I, along with Jennifer Grey and half the female population, gasped in surprise. I watched the movie over and over again. I practiced the moves with one of my friends, the girl I would eventually have my first kiss with, and let me tell you those were some raunchy moves. Somehow in all of that Dirty Dancing became about more than just a good looking guy in a black tank top. It became about the fantasy of meeting the one person would would dance with you to the music and the moves you both loved. It became about listening to your heart instead of what people were telling you to do. It became about standing up not only for love but for what is right and just and about not being afraid to do that.
Growing up is never easy and I think growing up queer adds its own set of problems to wrestle with but Johnny Castle and Baby taught me a lot about how to live and love and most importantly how to dance like no one is watching.
Lastly, I have to send my thoughts out to his wife Lisa Niemi. They shared the most beautiful dance for thirty four years. I hope she has all the support she needs.
P.S. I've had this icon for a long time and it feels really sad that this is the first time I'm using it.