A comment on privilege

[ladyoflisquill]

I often see a lot of lj friends post about issues relating to white privilege or male privilege and I wanted to say something on heterosexual privilege.

I was having dinner last night with a group of girls - some friends, some acquaintances, some I'd never met before. One of the girls who got married about 4 years ago, and who was a single mother previously to that, was saying how her and her husband would have been better off financially if they hadn't of gotten married. As a single mother she would still get lone parents allowance and mortgage allowance but as a married couple they get nothing.

And I was sitting there thinking, wow, I can't believe you're bitching about the fact that you have the choice to get married. I'm sorry you feel being legally entitled to be considered in your partners life is such a burden. I'm sorry that you will never have to face the reality of being turned away from your partners bedside because you are legally strangers, or that your child will be taken away from your partner in the event of your death because they are not biologically related.

And she finished off by saying something like, 'Oh but we wanted to be married, so we just did it'. 

 

Yeah... I'm glad you could do that! 

 

Comments

[cathalin.livejournal.com]

A really good reminder, thank you.

I mean to say also, I'm sorry. :(

[ladyoflisquill.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I was going to say something on the night but... I dunno it just wasn't a battle I wanted to fight at the time. I was just staring at her thinking 'Are you f*cking serious!'

I should add that this girl previously said to my BFF that she thought two guys being together was wrong and actually told the same thing to her then five year old daughter. And the sad thing is she is not actually a bigot but has allowed the ideas surrounding her in childhood to become her beliefs. Very sad!

[winterstorrm.livejournal.com]

I live in the UK and although same sex couples are not allowed to get 'married' they are allowed to have a 'civil partnership' which gives the sames rights - which is nice and all - but why can't they call it 'marriage'?

Sometimes I forget that this is not the same the world over, and I do think it's a bloody travesty, and I have no answer!

[ladyoflisquill.livejournal.com]

I'm in Ireland and we only just got civil partnership this year but it does not have the same rights and protections as marriage. Primarily children of civil partners are not protected. Which is a huge hit to families.

The new government has said it wants to introduce same-sex marriage in the next 4 years and the majority of the country supports this but I've heard politicians make promises before and I think I'll wait until it actually happens before I celebrate.